The red stain on my underwear pierced my eyes. It was the one thing I had not envisioned, yet here I was living my worst nightmare. I’ve never experienced this before so I don’t know what to expect. Yesterday there was a light stain and today too. Everything that I’ve read says that I should be experiencing cramping and that the blood will come in clots. Chunks of my deepest desire flowing through me like a poison releasing itself from my body. That’s what a miscarriage is. It is an abnormality in the fetus. The chromosomes didn’t split properly. Proof that what I believed was my miracle really wasn’t. Continue reading Overcoming Setbacks: Dealing with loss and how we recover
A few years ago I wrote a poem titled The Chosen which spoke of my struggle to conceive. It was probably the most personal poem I’ve ever written. With the birth of my beautiful daughter I felt that it was necessary to write a follow-up poem because I have finally been chosen to be a mother. These past five months have been the best five months of … Continue reading The Chosen (Part 2)
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” ~Rajneesh I came across that quote a couple of years ago when I first started writing my book, Welcome to Heartbreak. I found it to be simple, beautiful, and honest. For me it symbolized the feeling of motherhood, a feeling … Continue reading Reborn
Now that I am going to be a mom I find that most of my thoughts are consumed with my baby, what kind of mom I will be, and all the decisions that I will have to make that will affect her life. This point in my life is exciting and while I am anxious to hold my baby in my arms, I am also … Continue reading Vaccinating Baby: Should I or Shouldn’t I?