On Losing a Child: Every Parent’s Worst Nightmare

Being a parent is simultaneously rewarding and scary. I never thought it was possible to feel so much love, joy, happiness, and fear at the same time. When I heard the news of the Sandy Hook massacre and that a gunman had killed 20 children my heart could not grasp the enormity of the hole left in the hearts and lives of the parents of those murdered children. It is something I struggle with every time I hear of a murdered child. It was what I felt when I first heard the news of the Orlando mass shooting at Pulse nightclub and the same feeling I had when I heard of the young boy snatched by the alligator at the Disney Resort. Continue reading On Losing a Child: Every Parent’s Worst Nightmare

ABOVE THE HIGH: COPING WITH ADDICTION AND DEATH

*The following was originally published on The Manifest Station. NOVEMBER 17, 2015 By Nancy Arroyo Ruffin The first time I remember experiencing death I was three years old. My uncle Louie lay in a casket at the Ortiz Funeral Home wearing a light colored suit; it could’ve been white, beige maybe. His afro was neatly picked and in my three year old mind he appeared … Continue reading ABOVE THE HIGH: COPING WITH ADDICTION AND DEATH

Overcoming Setbacks: Dealing with loss and how we recover

The red stain on my underwear pierced my eyes. It was the one thing I had not envisioned, yet here I was living my worst nightmare. I’ve never experienced this before so I don’t know what to expect. Yesterday there was a light stain and today too. Everything that I’ve read says that I should be experiencing cramping and that the blood will come in clots. Chunks of my deepest desire flowing through me like a poison releasing itself from my body. That’s what a miscarriage is. It is an abnormality in the fetus. The chromosomes didn’t split properly. Proof that what I believed was my miracle really wasn’t. Continue reading Overcoming Setbacks: Dealing with loss and how we recover

Upcoming Events (Remembering Love: A La Loba Poetry & LatinosNYC Production)

Join me January 23, 2014 as I perform alongside some of NYC’s most distinguished poets at the Nuyorican Poet’s Café as we celebrate the memory of our loved ones who have passed on. Features include: Miguel Angeles Maria Aponte Marybeth Aponte Shamar Hill Flora Montes Maria Rodriguez Nancy Ruffin Tamara Saliva Papo Swiggity Mark Vigo aka Vigo Hard Feature Bios: Vanessa Mártir aka La Loba … Continue reading Upcoming Events (Remembering Love: A La Loba Poetry & LatinosNYC Production)

Remembering a Brother

When I was 16 I lost one of the closest people in my life. At the age of 15 my cousin was murdered at point blank range when an altercation with another kid escalated out of control. Today he would have celebrated his 33rd birthday and I can’t help but wonder if his murderer, only a child at the time as well, ever thinks about the life that he took. I wonder if he is remorseful. I wonder if he ever thinks about the little girl who had to grow up without her father. I wonder if he ever asks himself “Was it really worth it?” Continue reading Remembering a Brother